Breathe and feel the Breath of God

As you leave for your first year of college, you start new. You have a new GPA, new teachers, new classes, new friends, new food, and new activities in which to get involved. You do not have many obligations: go to class and make good grades. My first semester at Culver-Stockton, the fall of 2007, I felt so free. I had no commitments when I stepped foot on campus. I was always so involved in everything my high school offered, and now that I was a college freshman, I enjoyed just going to class, the cafeteria, and my room to study. That did not last long!

One month later, I was itching to get involved in something. I had so much time on my hands, and I needed something worth while to occupy my free time. Once I realized this, it did not take me long to get involved. I became the secretary of Disciples on Campus and a cheerleader within the week. I had cheerleading practice every morning from 5:45-7:15 and met every other Tuesday for Disciples on Campus. I still wanted to get more involved. Within the next month, I became a member of the Chi Omega Fraternity and a tutor for chemistry. By the end of my freshman year, I was a member of Phi Eta Sigma Freshman Honor Society, First Christian Church of Canton (Disciples of Christ), the chemistry teacher's assistant, and playing intramural sports.

I came back to school the next fall involved as a Wildcat Welcome Leader, cheerleader, secretary of Disciples on Campus, chemistry teacher's assistant and tutor, choir member, Up 'Til Dawn executive board member, Phi Eta Sigma President, and Chi Omega's social chair. One month later, I was asked to be a Community Assistant for Johnson Hall, a residential hall for upperclassmen women, and of course, I could not refuse such an offer. I had to move all of my belongings from the sorority house to my new room in Johnson Hall in one weekend without my parents. I moved across campus successfully in the rain and became a CA the next week with little training.

The same week I was asked to be a CA, my new church in Canton asked me to start a children's choir. The church was working on building up a children's church with a choir and youth group meetings every Wednesday. I had helped my mom direct the children's choir back in my hometown, so I was elated at the idea of doing it by myself. I would be the choir director for kindergarten through 8th graders. I prepared music for my kids and taught them new songs each week. They had never had any musical lessons before and did not know ANY Christian youth songs, but that meant I could teach them all of my personal favorites.

By November, I was starting to feel very overwhelmed with everything. I was involved in so many things on campus and taking eighteen credit hours including: organic chemistry, music theory, physics, sociology, survey of music literature, and a chemistry research project, all of which required me to spend several hours a week in labs. I was waking up at 5:30 each morning and going to bed around midnight (1 a.m. when I was on duty). I became very stressed and suffered from a lot of migraine headaches. I was so busy all the time I forgot to breathe. Weekends were so short, but every Monday, I tried to have a good attitude to start the week. By the time Wednesday rolled around and I was on my way to children's choir, my good attitude was long gone. I found myself moody, tired, stressed, and hungry. On my drive to the church, my mind raced with thoughts of the many things I should be doing if I did not have to go to children's church. But upon arrival, that would all change.

Every week as I walk into my church on Wednesdays at 4, I get the same feeling. I see all of the kids laughing, smiling, and playing with one another. They are all so happy, and once they see me, their eyes just fill with joy. They all run over and give me a huge hug asking me where I have been because they have been waiting for me. We sing and dance together, and their smiles never leave their faces. It is the greatest feeling in the world seeing those kids laugh and look up to me. I get the greatest feeling of accomplishment each week I leave that church. I am filled with love, joy, and compassion. All of my stress leaves.

I am so thankful for my Wednesdays at the church. It allows me to get away from the college and my stress, and remember what is important in life: sharing my love for the Lord through music, smiling, seeing life through the eyes of a child, and having fun. My kids teach me this lesson every week, and I look forward to our time together. It is so important to step back from your busy day and regroup and discover what is truly important. Take a break, breathe, and feel the breath of God.