Two roads diverged

"Two roads diverged in a yellow wood and sorry I could not travel both and be one traveller, long I stood and looked down one as far as I could to where it bent in the undergrowth..."

Two majors diverged in Horned Frog country, and it being possible that I travel both as one traveller, here I stand, seeking every experience that I possibly can, attempting to figure out where to go. In other words, I have reached fork in the path.

I received my call to ministry somewhere between junior year and graduation. It did not come in one definitive, identifiable moment; rather it accumulated over time and intensified with experience. Between the sermons I preached on Youth Sundays and the many hours a week I spent at St. Andrew Christian Church, I was fairly certain that I was on the fast track to becoming Rev. Kelly Rand by the age of twenty four.

And then, life happened, as it tends to do. I graduated from high school, moved eight hours away to go to Texas Christian University (Go Frogs!) and found myself knee deep in two incredible departments: Social Work and Religion. Now, here I sit, nine months and 31 credit hours later, quite unsure of what I want to do when I grow up.

Standing at this crossroads, staring down the infinite paths that lay before me, is both a blessing and a curse. A curse because my carefully plotted seven-year plan has flown out the window, over a mountain, and now resides at the bottom of some distant, proverbial lake. A blessing because my mind and spirit are open to the endless possibilities that a double major in social work and religion will prepare me for.

It is with that same open mind that I begin my summer at Union Avenue Christian Church, a respected urban church, rich in history, located right on the edge of north St. Louis in a neighbourhood that struggles daily with poverty, hunger and violence. According to the mission statement, Union Avenue is a place "where diverse hearts and minds come together to worship God and to become Biblically informed, socially responsible, artistically alive, and to demonstrate Christ's love." I started my internship only one week ago and already I see so much of the mission fulfilled on a daily basis.

The sanctuary, built to hold nearly five hundred people, will be alive with the sounds of music and drilling as it is converted into a theater for the Union Avenue Opera Theatre. The fellowship hall was abuzz on Sunday morning as the congregation kicked off a new exercise program, Walk to Jerusalem, which will unite the Union Avenue community in an effort to connect mind and spirit and accumulate enough miles worth of exercise to make the journey from St. Louis to Jerusalem. For those of you who do not know the mileage off to the tops of your heads, it is only 6,457 miles.

Nearly every second of the past week has been a learning experience both on and off the job. Meeting new people and finding my way around a new city has been frustrating and wonderful, for while I do not consider myself an extrovert or an expert navigator, I am continually being tugged out of my comfort zone and into new experiences and relationships. To be completely honest, though, my favorite lessons to learn are the ones learned the hard way; the ones learned by throwing pieces of yourself — your ideas, your passions, your visions — into the mix and seeing how they fare.

Thus far, I am no worse for the wear, and so I look forward to week two with this congregation, that I think knows what it is to stand at a crossroads, attempting to balance its own needs with its commitment to being an active presence in the community and social service organizations immediately surrounding it. As people of faith, we are required to believe in the impossible, so the possibilities for this congregation, and for me, are endless.

"I shall be telling this with a sigh somewhere ages and ages hence: Two roads diverged in a wood, and I — I took the one less traveled by, and that has made all the difference." I shall be telling this with a tear and a smile somewhere I haven't even discovered yet: Two majors diverged in my heart and I — I forged my own road to travel by, and that has made all the difference. I cannot even begin to imagine what my summer with Union Avenue will bring, but bombarded by one learning experience after another, I rejoice, because the possibilities are endless.

Kelly Rand is in her second year as a HELM Leadership Fellow and is a member of St. Andrew Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) in Olathe, Kansas.